My friend called me to ask if he should be at work. Mind you this was at about 2 pm. I reminded him that we were closed and most of Champaign-Urbana was still closed.
Anyway, he informed me that his car was snowplowed in. Meaning that the snowplows kindly built a little snow fort around his car as they were cleaning off the roadways. I said, “Oh, yeah. They’ll do that.”
It didn’t dawn on me until about three hours later that my car might be in the same boat. I put on my shoes and a coat and headed outside to survey the handiwork of the plows. It was just as I feared.
I had about four feet of snow piled up behind my car. It was higher than my license plate. The snow on the driver’s side of the car had drifted just below the window. I started digging the door free and quickly realized that I needed a snow shovel. I don’t own a snow shovel.
So, I walked over to the friendly person manning the front entrance gatehouse and asked if there was a snow shovel I could conveniently borrow for a few minutes. He informed me that I could be put on the waiting list. Fearing that my name wouldn’t be called anytime soon, I decided to take a stroll to see if I could actually purchase a snow shovel. That was deemed far too dangerous.
As I made my way to the road, I realized that the snow plows had done a bang-up job on the roads. However, the sidewalks were pretty much impassable. I don’t know what the actual final snowfall was, but my unofficial record is not quite up to my knee.
I then decided to walk back to my apartment and contemplate how I was going to get my car out of its frozen prison. As I was walking back I noticed that my former ex-niece (being that she’s my ex-wife’s niece) who lives across from me had her car free and clear. Thinking she might be an owner of a snow shovel, I head up her stairs and ask.
She has no snow shovel, but she is willing to drive me someplace so I could possible purchase said item. This would almost prove our undoing.
We headed to Walgreens. No shovels and hell just getting in and out of the parking lot. We tried Big Lots, but they had a big sign on the door with the words, “Snow shovels sold out.” This would be a frequent occurrence. We tried Target, Lowe’s and finally Wal-Mart. All sold out. We even got stuck once and I had to push us out. By now it was quite dark and there was no way I was getting my car out of its parking place without a little help.
Well, my ex-niece pulled a rabbit out of her hat and started digging with her super-dooper ice-scrapper. I started digging around the tires, taking a lot longer than I thought to find concrete. After a few minutes of ice-scrapper and hand digging, I decided to give it a run.
I hopped into my now warm vehicle and put it in reverse. Not a lot of traction to be found, but I rocked it back and forth and finally got my car out of its icy non-garage. I parked it in a cleared spot .
I thanked my ex-niece for all her help and retreated to my warm apartment secure in the knowledge I could now make it to work on time in the morning. I think that’s a good thing…